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Die Nasa hat Wasser auf dem Mars gefunden:

http://apod.nasa.gov/apod/image/0504/WaterOnMars2_gcc.jpg

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Oder: Bastard Operator From Hell? 😀

http://www.thewebsiteisdown.com/

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/home/httpd/vhosts/scratchbook.ch/httpdocs/wp-content/plugins/lightbox-plus/classes/shd.class.php on line 707

The following poem appeared in the May/June 1990 issue of Infocus magazine and has since been floating around the Internet. The original authors were Fred Bremmer and Steve Kroese of Calvin College & Seminary of Grand Rapids, Michigan.

A poll conducted among Infocus readers had established “waka” as the proper pronunciation for the angle-bracket characters < and >, though some readers held out resolutely for “norkies.”

< > ! * ' ' #

^ " ` $ $ -

! * = @ $ _

% * < > ~ # 4

& [ ] . . /

| { , , SYSTEM HALTED

The poem can only be appreciated by reading it aloud, to wit:

<  >  !   *  '  '  #
Waka waka bang splat tick tick hash,

^  "    `    $   $  -
Caret quote back-tick dollar dollar dash,

!  *  =  @  $    _
Bang splat equal at dollar under-score,

%   *   <  >  ~   #   4
Percent splat waka waka tilde number four,

&     [    ]   . .  /
Ampersand bracket bracket dot dot slash,

|       {      ,    , SYSTEM HALTED
Vertical-bar curly-bracket comma comma CRASH.

[via about.com]

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1. Any given program, once deployed, is already obsolete.
2. It is easier to change the specification to fit the program than vice versa.
3. If a program is useful, it will have to be changed.
4. If a program is useless, it will have to be documented.
5. Only ten percent of the code in any given program will ever execute.
6. Software expands to consume all available resources.
7. Any non-trivial program contains at least one error.
8. The probability of a flawless demo is inversely proportional to the number of people watching, raised to the power of the amount of money involved.
9. Not until a program has been in production for at least six months will its most harmful error be discovered.
10. Undetectable errors are infinite in variety, in contrast to detectable errors, which by definition are limited.
11. The effort required to correct an error increases exponentially with time.
12. Program complexity grows until it exceeds the capabilities of the programmer who must maintain it.
13. Any code of your own that you haven’t looked at in months might as well have been written by someone else.
14. Inside every small program is a large program struggling to get out.
15. The sooner you start coding a program, the longer it will take.
16. A carelessly planned project takes three times longer to complete than expected; a carefully planned project takes only twice as long.
17. Adding programmers to a late project makes it later.
18. A program is never less than 90% complete, and never more than 95% complete.
19. If you automate a mess, you get an automated mess.
20. Build a program that even a fool can use, and only a fool will want to use it.
21. Users truly don’t know what they want in a program until they use it.

[via devtopics.com]

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Gestern ist mir beim Velofahren dieses Schild aufgefallen.

Wenn man beim Tontaubenschiessen auf Tontauben schiesst, was ist dann „Volksschiessen“ ?

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Seit Januar liegt ein Stapel sinnloser Papiere auf meinem „Mache-ich-Morgen“-Tisch. Die Steuererklärung… Es reicht schon, wenn ich das ansehe, und ich kann den Gähnreflex kaum unterdrücken.
Als dann vor zwei Wochen eine Einladung kam, ich soll das doch bitte in den nächsten 14 Tagen ausfüllen, hab ich mich wohl oder übel mal rangesetzt. Zum Glück gibt’s da ein Online-Tool.

Mal sehen: Einkommen. Hmm. Gilt ja nur für letztes Jahr. August – Dezember: 5 Monate. Also der Monatslohn mal fünf.
Abzüge? Aaach, lasst mich doch mit diesem Formular-Scheiss in Ruhe! Verkehrsmittel, Krankenversicherung.. Was muss ich da eintragen? Keine Ahnung.
Jetzt gurkt es mich aber so richtig an. Jetzt fülle ich einfach nur mal die Pflichtfelder aus – das wird wohl reichen. Konfession? Bin doch nicht in der Kirche!

Gut, passt. Absenden. Oh, was wollen die noch? Eine Kopie des Lohnausweises? Hmm, wo hab ich den… *grübel* – ah hier. Upps – da steht aber etwas anderes drauf beim Einkommen! 🙂
Hab mich um 4000.- verpeilt – tja Pech, jetzt ist das Formular schon weg. Die werden’s schon merken.

—

Zwei Tage später flattert ein Brief rein: Ich habe angegeben, keiner Kirche anzugehören. Das Einwohneramt Aesch meldet aber, ich wäre römisch-katholisch. Gopf, dieses Saukaff macht immer Ärger!

Warum füllt die Steuerbehörde meine Steuererklärung nicht gleich selber aus, wenn sie’s sowieso immer besser wissen?

Gestern bin ich auf’s Steueramt. Wie trete ich aus dieser Kirche aus? Reicht es, wenn ich nicht an Gott glaube und die Kirche abreissen will?

„Nein, da müssen Sie auf das Einwohneramt, ein Schreiben aufsetzen und amtlich beglaubigen lassen. Das senden Sie dann an ihre Kirchgemeinde.“

Dieses amtliche trallala scheint wohl Ewig zu dauern. Deshalb fackelte ich nicht lange, verlangte einen Stift und Papier und schrieb diese Austrittserklärung gleich vor Ort.

Und jetzt kommt’s: Der Beamte klebte einen Zettel unten an den Brief, in dem steht, das meine Unterschrift „echt“ ist 😀 und drückte noch einen Stempel drauf:

Das macht Fr. 20.-.

20.- für einen Stempel – die spinnen, die Römer!

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Die wichtigste Neuigkeit der Welt endlich in Bildern… 🙂

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nuff said!